Friday I had to take my youngest to the doctor. It was for a long over due check up.
When I arrived for my appointment, surprisingly early, I noticed there were quite a few in front of me. So we sat or at least I sat - she played. I waited.
Some us were starting to get agitated that we were still waiting. Yes, I said "us", because I too, was among those getting annoyed. I was worried that I would be late picking up my older three children from school if he didn't start calling people back to be seen.
Finally, a mother with her baby comes out - when that happens you know that someone would be called next. Except there something unusual about this duo or at least the baby.
He was so tiny.
So adorable, but so tiny.
Someone who had been among those waiting, asked what we were all wanting to know.
"He is so tiny, how old is he?"
"Two months" was the reply. You could hear very muffled "awes" all around the room.
"Oh, he was a preemie?"
"Actually, he is what is considered a micro-preemie. His due date isn't even until March 11th. He weighed only 2.5 lbs."
"Aww - so did he come naturally?" - Ok, honestly, had I been "brave" enough to ask any questions, I certainly would have already stopped. But... I am glad this lady asked on.
"Yes, he was born naturally. However, I am his adoptive mom. His birth mother had cancer. She has sinced passed away."
You could have heard a pin drop.
At that moment, I think every mom in the waiting room, whether they were there with there older child, toddler or new baby held on to them a little tighter.
As I sat there waiting for us to be called back, no longer agitated in the least, I couldn't stop thinking about this woman.
In my mind I thought about all the scenarios that led to this child being an orphan.
I imagined this young vibrant woman who just found out she was expecting, maybe a bit unexpected, maybe alone. I imagined that once she was over the initial shock or maybe there was no shock, she was very excited. She was anxiously waiting for her first doctor's appointment, wishing they didn't make her wait so long before they would see her.
That day comes. Maybe she was surprised at all the blood work they do when you find out you are pregnant, maybe not though.
I am sure though, she was surprised the day she received the call from the doctor, telling her that something came back abnormal. I am sure she was shocked the day they told her she had cancer.
I imagine the doctors telling her she needed to abort this baby, so that she could receive treatment. Maybe she even had loved ones that begged of her to please do what the doctors say..save yourself. Maybe they told her that her life is more important than the life she carried inside of her.
I imagine her telling them all NO.
I imagine her thinking this baby is a life, not a choice. I imagine her knowing that Jesus made the same decision for her, for us, on a hill called Calvary. I imagine her finding peace in her decision.
While I obviously do not know how the above scenario played out for the woman above, I couldn't help but imagine. It brought me to a place of such gratitude. Gratitude not just for the health of my children, but for the health of Brian and I. I cannot imagine not seeing my children grow up.
However, it also gave me a glimpse, a very human glimpse of the ultimate sacrifice that Jesus Christ made for each and every one of us. It is so hard to wrap my mind around that ultimate sacrifice, but thankfully I do not have wrap my mind around it, I just have to wrap my heart around it.